Interpreted By Naching T. Kassa
Greetings, HWA faithful, and welcome to the Horror Watch!
Watchung has returned from his rollabout and finally recovered from his humiliating experience at Bob’s Burger Bar and Convention Center. (Just don’t mention the word “cinnamon” in his presence.) His travels have refreshed him and, with renewed vigor, he has decided that his next film will be … a horror musical! That’s right, after the direct-to-video release of PUMPKINS FROM PLANET P 2, he will begin filming PUMPKINS FROM PLANET P: THE MUSICAL! Watchung will produce, direct, star, choreograph, make the sandwiches, and write the songs for the film. Auditions are already underway. If you’re willing to work for a ham-on-rye, can carry a tune, and enjoy the feeling of a rubber pumpkin suit, Watchung says: “Come on down!”
Now, while he watches the Planet P Dancers strut their stuff, let’s see what terrors he’s found for us this month.
AMERICAN HORROR STORY: 1984 will premiere Wednesday, September 18. Emma Roberts, Gus Kenworthy, Angelica Ross, Cody Fern, Billie Lourd, and Sarah Paulson (in a small role) will star. Evan Peters will not appear in this season.
Here are the shows debuting or returning this fall.
Sep 10 MR. MERCEDES SEASON 3 AT&T Audience Network 10 PM
Sep 18 AHS:1984 FX 10 PM
Sep 23 HALLOWEEN BAKING The Food Network 9 PM
Sep 26 CREEPSHOW Shudder 12 AM
Sep 29 HALLOWEEN WARS 9 The Food Network 9 PM
Oct 1 MOST TERRIFYING PLACES The Travel Channel 10 PM
Oct 6 THE WALKING DEAD 10 AMC 9 PM
Oct 6 TALKING DEAD 9 AMC 10 PM
Oct 6 WITCHES OF SALEM The Travel Channel 10 PM
Oct 10 SUPERNATURAL 15 CW 8 PM
Oct 11 CHARMED 2 CW 8 PM
Oct 31 GHOST ADVENTURES The Travel Channel 9 PM
Watchung is a bit disappointed. A few years ago, over 30 horror shows were premiering in the fall.
Oh well. On to movies!
IT: CHAPTER 2—Friday, September 6, Rated R. Twenty-seven years after the events of the first film, the Loser’s Club returns to Derry to battle Pennywise. Stars Bill Skarsgard, James McAvoy, and Jessica Chastain.
Alexandre Aja, director of CRAWL, will direct an interactive horror movie for Steven Spielberg’s Amblin Entertainment. The film will involve a haunted house, and the audience will use a special app on their cell phones to “choose their own adventure.” No word yet on when the film will premiere, but Watchung is watching!
THE DEAD DON’T DIE—Tuesday, September 10, Rated R. Zombie comedy stars Bill Murray and Adam Driver.
NEKROTRONIC—Tuesday, September 10, Rated R. A man learns he is part of a sect which hunts demons.
CHILD’S PLAY—Tuesday, September 24, Rated R. This remake of the 1988 film stars Mark Hamill as the voice of the demonic doll, Chucky.
FRIDAY THE 13TH THE GAME—ULTIMATE SLASHER EDITION premiered on the Nintendo Switch August 13. The game includes many extras and, though it originally debuted on May 26, 2017, this is the first time it’s been available on the Switch platform.
That’s it for this edition of Watchung’s Horror Watch. Our favorite demonic pumpkin would like to remind you of two things. First, no entertainment, not even video games, could exist without writers. And, second, if there’s horror news out there, Watchung is watching!
Special thanks to the following Web sites: wheresthejump.com, dreadcentral.com, bloodydisgusting.com, ihorror.com, joblo.com, thisishorror.co.uk, dvdreleasedates.com, promotehorror.com, dailydead.com, horrorfreaknews.com, collider.com, nerdmuch.com, imdb.com,gamespot.com, cinemablend.com, gameranx.com, ew.com, horrornews.net, usgamer.net, hollywoodreporter.com, and wikipedia.com.